The Boy’s parents came to visit for his birthday, and his mother remarked "Awe! You said you were big, but you don’t look that big! You don’t look 8 months pregnant! Here’s a woman who looks eight months pregnant!" – and she proceeded to show me pictures of her friend’s pregnant daughter who did, in fact, look like a blueberry. I felt like my complaints and aches and pains were for naught. Here was a twiggy chick with a belly that looked like a giant punch-ball balloon, and I was complaining about my basketball. (And my achy pelvis. For which I had to buy a $60 harness…which only "alleviates" some pain, it doesn’t destroy it… and which was described to me as "skin" color by the White, Muslim lady behind the counter much to my annoyance.)
However, about two weeks later (April 7th – 34 Weeks) after taking off work early for an OB appointment and deciding to grab some lunch and gaze longingly at the little girl clothes in the consignment shop (I ended up buying two yellow sheets – one gingham and the other plain. It sated my desire to buy baby stuff, and it was a pretty practical purchase, I felt.) the lady in Little Red Hen looked at me with a sweet-sad-syrupy smile and said "Awe! You poor thing! I remember being that pregnant! When are you due?" The other ladies standing around nodded in agreement. They all remembered being "that pregnant" and the misery of surviving the sun whilst "that pregnant". When I responded that I wasn’t due until the end of May she shook her head and said "Awe…you’ve got a ways to go!" I figured it was just a perception discrepancy between women who’d birthed normal sized babies and a mother-in-law whose youngest son was close to 12lbs at birth…until I walked past a woman who was hugely pregnant, briefly felt sorry for her, and then did a double take because I realized that I was the hugely pregnant woman I was pitying…I was walking past a large, plate glass window.
After feeling stupid for taking more than half a second to register my own reflection, I decided to go home and see just how pregnant I looked. Yeah…
Suddenly, in two weeks, I’d gone from cute little pregnant lady to "that pregnant".
Granted, I wasn’t wearing the white cami while walking around downtown – but I felt that this cami, which covered the bottom of my belly the week before, perfectly illustrated the baby’s/my tummy’s growth.
A few months back – waaaay back in October, I asked The Boy to grab something for me, because I was "Soooo" pregnant. "I’m great with child!" I’d protested. "Meh…you’re only minor with child at best," he replied. A couple of days ago, I asked him to reassess my condition. "What about now? Am I ‘great with child’ yet?" I’d asked. "Hm. I’d say you’re…AWESOME with child! Hi-five!"
- Baby Shower(s) – two down! The family one was awesome and Baby Zuri received an outpouring of gifts that I did not expect!
- Maternity Photos – We took those on April 10th and though I’ve only seen one copy, it would appear that Allie’s done an excellent job! I’m sitting on a blanket looking peaceful and serene and holding my chunk o’ belly.
- I live my life, or at least "sleep my sleep" in accordance with the wishes of The Tums. The Tums are not to be questioned, simply chewed up before bed. The other night was a six-Tums type of night – thanks to delicious eggs scrambled with andouille sausage and pepper jack cheese…oh, and about a quart of Orange Juice. I’ve been instructed to set aside the spicy and the citrusy and to invest in some Zantac. I’m not sure how The Tums will feel about being replaced…
- I’ve been going HAM on some dirt and dust. Far from simply keeping my resolution to vacuum once a week – for the sake of the particles a crawling little one may pop into her mouth – I have discovered that one of the attachments on the cleaner is particularly good for getting into corners…and window casings…and vacuuming up dust on book and media shelves…and xboxes and the like. I went crazy, crawling around on all fours dragging an unwilling banana-colored Eureka behind me, sucking up particulates.
- I’ve also been going hard on scents – fulfilling my craving for more cleanliness with Baking Soda (I simply had to brush my teeth with it. And then I simply had to scrub the kitchen counters and sink and stove with it. And then I simply had to sprinkle it onto the carpets…and in the laundry…and in the trashcans…and in the toilets…). And though I’m frustrated that it seems that dirt hides everywhere I sniff, I must admit that I’m secretly excited about having an excuse to do more scrubbing, scouring, and bubble making. I’m almost out of Baking Soda. I think another trip to the Whole Foods is in order.
- I discovered the deliciousness of Soy Milk. Not as great as cow’s milk, but I’m growing less and less tolerant of lactose as time goes by. It was a relief to find that I could substitute some soy milk in my breakfast cereal and still have an enjoyable breakfast treat. And…I didn’t feel like throwing everything up at the end of the day.
- I’ve been cramping a lot lately, and I’ve seen a little bit o’ blood. At my last doctor’s appointment I was 25% effaced and just barely starting to dilate. She, in the 55%tile for weight is tipping the scales at approximately 6.5lbs. (Her tummy, interestingly enough, measured in the 81%tile. Should I be nervous about her size? About the cramping? About my cervix? "Well, she won’t be here this week," was the doctor’s response. "But if you went into labor now, we wouldn’t stop you." Exciting.